PX This presents THE "WORD OF MOUTH" REVIEW
We’re actually getting kinda sick of new restaurants; it’s a bit tedious pointing out the same types of flaws over and over and over again and ultimately being disappointed more often than impressed. (Here’s a novel idea: why don’t you try working to improve the shitty restaurant you already have, rather than opening a new one every nine months, you greedy egomaniacal bastard?) But hey, maybe that’s just us.
Anyhoo! It’s so nice to see you! We hadn’t planned on visiting your place, probably like— ever— but the "word of mouth" on this joint has been pretty outstanding. So, ya know— we’re intrigued. We’re hoping that good "word of mouth" is all genuine, and we can get us some of that good in our mouth. Word.
What’s that? You’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you’re hoping we’ll like it and help spread the news, since you fired your publicist long ago for not doing jack shit for you?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what obnoxious opinionated food-bloggers are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !
What exactly made you choose our restaurant?
Actually, my hosts chose it; I think it came highly recommended to them by a concierge at the Grand Hotel Timeo in Taormina, Sicily (and again by a taxicab driver in Malfa, Salina).
What was your first impression?
Cute. Love it.
Please rate the Bar:
Come to think of it, I’m not finding many bars in Italy at all— do they have such a thing? Cuz I mean like technically, if you go to Ristorante Alfredo in Cucina, then the entire Da Alfredo (in the front) is actually considered their "bar."
Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
Uh, N/A? From what I gather, wine and spirits just aint the thing around here. When people come to Alfredo, they drink granite, period end of story. And I must admit, that stuff is gooood.
Please rate the Dining Room:
Oh it’s pretty cramped and haphazard and sorta butt-assed ugly. But who the heck cares, when you have that view.
Please rate the BOH:
It’s perfectly decent at making their specialty, which is pane cunzato. But again, I get the distinct impression it’s the granite that really matters.
How was the staff?
Proficient and amiable. What more do you need?
What did you eat?/ How was the food?
Pane Cunzato con tonno : Good. Nice fresh tasty ingredients, but personally I find the pane part a wee too rustic (i.e. thick). Like I mean for example, if a chef decided to make this dish in New York, it’d probably be with a much finer more delicate "crust," and then that‘d be the ticket.
Pane Cunzato con ricotta infornata : Yea, see above.
Pane Cunzato con melanzane : Eh, probably my least favorite.
Pane Cunzato con pomodoro e acciughe : Pretty good, hearty flavors.
Pane Cunzato con mozzarella e pomodoro : Nice and simple. I like this one best of all.
Almond, chocolate, white fig, peach, strawberry, and cafe granite : All pretty damned yummy, with the white fig, almond, and peach (in that order) being the greatest standouts. So fresh and unadulterated. But the cafe granita was the least appealing.
What did you like?
Mmmm… graniiita…
What did you dislike?
Oi, too much bread, I can’t breathe.
What was your last impression?
Seriously, how fucking cool am I right now. I’m not even sure how I got here.
Would you come back?
Oh please please please please please gawd pleeeease….
Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
‘Piacere. Buona giornata, grazie e arrivederci.
More photographs of Da Alfredo, Salina-Lingua, and/or the rest of Isole Eolie are at abbediaz.com
* * * * *
Have you heard?
Until the release of PX Me – The Sequel to PX This (Spring 2012), this website will henceforth be updated only intermittently (approximately once or twice a week).
Abbe Diaz’s new (daily) blog is now at: abbediaz.com
PX This presents THE "WORD OF MOUTH" REVIEW
We’re actually getting kinda sick of new restaurants; it’s a bit tedious pointing out the same types of flaws over and over and over again and ultimately being disappointed more often than impressed. (Here’s a novel idea: why don’t you try working to improve the shitty restaurant you already have, rather than opening a new one every nine months, you greedy egomaniacal bastard?) But hey, maybe that’s just us.
Anyhoo! It’s so nice to see you! We hadn’t planned on visiting your place, probably like— ever— but the "word of mouth" on this joint has been pretty outstanding. So, ya know— we’re intrigued. We’re hoping that good "word of mouth" is all genuine, and we can get us some of that good in our mouth. Word.
What’s that? You’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you’re hoping we’ll like it and help spread the news, since you fired your publicist long ago for not doing jack shit for you?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what obnoxious opinionated food-bloggers are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !
What exactly made you choose our restaurant?
Actually, my hosts chose it; I think it came highly recommended to them by a friend who’d visited the Aeolian Islands the summer prior.
What was your first impression?
Wow. Holy cow.
Please rate the Bar:
N/A? If there’s a bar, I didn’t see one. But they do have an extraordinary outdoor patio/lounge overlooking the Tyrrhenian Sea that’s "for drinks and dessert only." In which case, who needs an effin bar?
Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
Opted for wine (a Chardonnay I didn’t choose, which was very good) so I have no idea about the cocktails, sorry. But quite frankly, with an ambience like this, I might very well have been quite happy drinking hooch and Boone’s Farm, I’m not sure.
Oh okay, on a more serious note, my friend’s Campari and soda looked appealing, respectable, and refreshing— and it had a beautiful fresh orange slice in it. So I’m willing to bet the majority of their cocktails really don’t suck at all.
Please rate the Dining Room:
Beautiful. Rustic yet incredibly elegant. And again, that view…
Please rate the BOH:
Outstanding. Really truly excellent, no exaggeration.
As a person of my — ahem — "noted" expertise, I am often asked where I’ve had the most phenomenal dining experience. Well, now I finally have an answer I needn’t think that hard about nor elaborate with justifications and explanations. Ha ha ha ahah, I can’t wait to tell the next person that inquires that one of my favoritest restaurants everrr is in Malfa on Salina the Aeolian Island in the Tyrrhenian Sea just off the coast of Sicily ("you muuust go by boat, dahling"). It sounds even more awesomely pretentious than "al Moro in Rome."
How was the staff?
Wonderful. Very congenial and accommodating, especially considering we arrived without a reservation (it soon became much more crowded than the photos would suggest).
In all honesty, the waiter seemed a bit agitated at first when he mistakenly thought our (large-ish) party was going to skip appetizers, but he got a lot more amicable when the food and wine orders started rolling in heartily.
What did you eat?/ How was the food?
Raw fish ("cruditá") fresh from the sea : Amazing. Without a doubt the best I’ve had in my whole entire life. The shrimp especially was of a buttery texture and flavor that’s damned near indescribable. I am not kidding when I say I feel like I’ve had some kind of crudo epiphany. If seafood is shipped in from eh-nee-where, it will never ever ever ever EVER taste like this.
Grilled octopus : You know that pretty general perception that if an octopus is fully grown or older or whatever (as opposed to the cute whole little babies), then it’s inevitably going to be a bit firm (i.e. "tough," i.e. "chewy")? Well, that’s a straight-up LIE, evidently. Cuz this one was as tender, succulent, and tasty as a cute little baby octopus’s ass. So now that’s two epiphanies.
Some kind of tiny ravioli-like pasta, the name of which I can’t recall, with something "pork ragu" and fresh tomato : Omylord, so delicious. And I really looove how the portion size was just exactly perfect and sufficient (for a late-night pasta dinner the evening before you have to don a bikini early the very next day). This is how Italians (in Italy) stay so slim.
Panna cotta : Oi. I’m generally not a dessert person, but I ate the whole thing. Just the right amount of dolce with a consistency like gelatinous air.
Biscotti and Malvasia : Somebody call my moms cuz I musta died and gone to heaven.
What did you like?
Are you kidding?
What did you dislike?
It’s a helluva trip to get back here.
What was your last impression?
Can this place possibly really exist?
Would you come back?
Oh please please please please please gawd pleeeease….
Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
Buona notte, grazie mille. Che bellissima sorpresa.
More photographs of Signum, Salina-Malfa, and/or the rest of Isole Eolie are at abbediaz.com
* * * * *
Have you heard?
Until the release of PX Me – The Sequel to PX This (Spring 2012), this website will henceforth be updated only intermittently (approximately once or twice a week).
Abbe Diaz’s new (daily) blog is now at: abbediaz.com
PX This presents THE "WORD OF MOUTH" REVIEW
We’re actually getting kinda sick of new restaurants; it’s a bit tedious pointing out the same types of flaws over and over and over again and ultimately being disappointed more often than impressed. (Here’s a novel idea: why don’t you try working to improve the shitty restaurant you already have, rather than opening a new one every nine months, you greedy egomaniacal bastard?) But hey, maybe that’s just us.
Anyhoo! It’s so nice to see you! We hadn’t planned on visiting your place, probably like— ever— but the "word of mouth" on this joint has been pretty outstanding. So, ya know— we’re intrigued. We’re hoping that good "word of mouth" is all genuine, and we can get us some of that good in our mouth. Word.
What’s that? You’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you’re hoping we’ll like it and help spread the news, since you fired your publicist long ago for not doing jack shit for you?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what obnoxious opinionated food-bloggers are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !
What exactly made you choose our restaurant?
It came very highly recommended by a friend who visits Rome frequently (so frequently in fact, he has an "apartment" at Hotel Eden).
What was your first impression?
Oh boy. Despite its "casual" atmosphere, it’s a bit intimidating. The entrance is unassuming, but as soon as the door opens everybody in the dining room is immediately distracted by your arrival. And a lot of the gentlemen are in jackets.
Also, the host is just a tad unnerving.
Please rate the Bar:
I was so busy trying to maintain my comportment at all the sudden unexpected scrutiny, I didn’t even notice if there’s a bar. My bad!
Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
Ha ha ah haa, the wine list is like a bible; it’s huge. I’ve never been so glad to have what little wine knowledge I possess. My waiter was apparently charmed by my sagacious selection (a Friulano Vermentino). Whew! I’m in.
Please rate the Dining Room:
There are several; the restaurant is split into three (or four?) separate rooms.
Please rate the BOH:
Excellent.
Okay seriously now, I have dined in Italy before— in Milan, Taormina, and Lake Como. And sorry, but the experiences had me sorta wondering how Italian cuisine came to be so internationally renowned. Don’t get me wrong, I have had (albeit rarely) some really truly superb Italian food all right— in New York— where the chefs were all very highly trained and often implemented techniques / incorporated ingredients that can hardly be described as "traditional" homemade Italian.
Well, I finally feel like I’ve discovered what all the fuss is about. Al Moro’s food is very simple and the preparation quite rustic, but it was undoubtedly one of the best meals I’ve ever had in my life.
How was the staff?
Once they’ve recognized a true appreciator of fine food and wine, they’re like putty in your hands. Before then, they kinda have a way of making you, the obvious foreigner, feel a bit like an interloper. [Think La Esquina or Boom Boom, only without the doorman, the DJ, and all the young Americans.]
What did you eat?/ How was the food?
Antipasto misto : Was unbelievably fresh and tasty enough to have you wondering where the hell all the smoked meats you’ve ever tasted in your life have been stored (and for how long) before they’d ever reached your plate. An old gym locker inside an Egyptian pyramid maybe.
Acciughe with some Italian description I didn’t quite understand nor do I remember : But it was marinated in the "traditional" way and served with toasted bread and butter. Oi, no words can describe. This is why Italians just wave a hand in the air in circles, palm turned upward at about a 45 degree angle. Try it. Yea, that pretty much sums it up as befittingly as possible.
Melanzane Parmigiana : What can I say; I simply couldn’t resist. Also, see above appraisal.
Bucatini with salsicci e funghi : Oh my. Yea yea see above.
Wild strawberries with zabaglione : Uh, I think you get the picture by now, yes?
What did you like?
Everything.
What did you dislike?
That thirty seconds of scariness in the very beginning? It was like a scene out of an old mob movie.
What was your last impression?
Even the chef came out of the kitchen to check out "the Americans." Heee.
Would you come back?
Oh hells yeah.
Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
Grazie mille, arriverderci.
* * * * *
Have you heard?
Until the release of PX Me- The Sequel to PX This (Spring 2012), this website will henceforth be updated only intermittently (approximately once or twice a week).
Abbe Diaz’s new (daily) blog is now at: abbediaz.com
Check out talented former F&B industry superstar and homeslice Jersey Murray, founder of Black Ice Management and stylist to The Real Housewives of NYC‘s Countess LuAnn de Lesseps, in the "The Making of LuAnn’s (New) Music Video" on Bravo!
Yay! Hooray!
:)
* * * * *
Have you heard?
Until the release of PX Me- The Sequel to PX This (Spring 2012), this website will henceforth be updated only intermittently (approximately once or twice a week).
Abbe Diaz’s new (daily) blog is now at: abbediaz.com
Hey, has anyone ever had a "horrible boss" by any chance? We know we know— it’s like, sooo totally unlikely in the F&B industry!— but we’d just thought we’d ask. Anybody? Anybody? Bueller? Diaz?
Oh, there I am! Lookit that: "Abbe Diaz, a 42-year-old living in Greenwich Village, had so many bad experiences working in New York City restaurants that she wrote a book about it, PX This. (Diary of the ‘Maître d’ to the Stars’)…"
Aww maaan, did they leave out the part about the boss that would undermine potential business/customers simply to… oh forget it never mind. (Thanks, Daily News!)
However, if by some chance you’d like to know more about my crazy contemptible crackheaded mutherfukkers "horrible" bosses (and sooo much more), you know where to go! You’ll laugh! You’ll cry! It’s the… oh you get the picture.
Yay, me!
* * * * *
Have you heard?
Until the release of PX Me- The Sequel to PX This (Spring 2012), this website will henceforth be updated only intermittently (approximately once or twice a week).
Abbe Diaz’s new (daily) blog is now at: abbediaz.com
• Which former "celebrity" chef is (quite apparently) really desperate to find a job?
Anybody hiring? Call us— we’ll… uh… gladly make the introduction, take a standard headhunter’s commission, pat you on the back and wish you good luck (chances are you’re gonna need it).
• Which popular impresario’s shotgun wedding has insightful insiders scratching their heads at the peculiarly matched couple and hasty nuptials? Well, try checking back with them around December of this year— or hell, you should get pretty obvious "hints" even earlier. All your burning perturbed questions should be answered by then, duh. (Yea— it’s just about as… uh… typical as you can get.)
• Which new beleaguered hotel has a whooole new mess of problems to contend with? Their already-delayed opening is very likely to be postponed further. (Also, maybe expect a significant concept modification.)
• Which nightclub impresario (and friends) were tossed from his table at a tony East Hampton eatery? Evidently, this person is unaware of some basic restaurant rules. For example, when you go out to dine, you should always 1) actually order some FOOD, 2) NOT usurp tables meant/reserved for other patrons without permission, 3) LEAVE when even all your water glasses have long been cleared from the table, and 4) NOT be an obnoxious tool for absolutely no good reason. Or, ya know— take that cheap, self-entitled, arrogant attitude of yours back to downtown Manhattan where it belongs.
PX This presents THE "WORD OF MOUTH" REVIEW
We’re actually getting kinda sick of new restaurants; it’s a bit tedious pointing out the same types of flaws over and over and over again and ultimately being disappointed more often than impressed. (Here’s a novel idea: why don’t you try working to improve the shitty restaurant you already have, rather than opening a new one every nine months, you greedy egomaniacal bastard?) But hey, maybe that’s just us.
Anyhoo! It’s so nice to see you! We hadn’t planned on visiting your place, probably like— ever— but the "word of mouth" on this joint has been pretty outstanding. So, ya know— we’re intrigued. We’re hoping that good "word of mouth" is all genuine, and we can get us some of that good in our mouth. Word.
What’s that? You’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you’re hoping we’ll like it and help spread the news, since you fired your publicist long ago for not doing jack shit for you?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what obnoxious opinionated food-bloggers are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !
Vine Street Cafe (Shelter Island)
What exactly made you choose our restaurant?
A two-time Manhattan restaurateur (and local resident) recommended it as "the best of four decent restaurants on Shelter Island." So there you have it.
What was your first impression?
Cute. Very beach-towny all right. And: damn, it’s crowded.
Please rate the Bar:
OK. On the smallish side; not quite so accommodating and pretty cramped. The bartenders are rather harried subsequently.
Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
No idea. It’s so busy in here, I can’t be dicked to ask/wait for a cocktail and/or wine list. "I’ll take a bottle of… uh… riesling? Cool."
Please rate the Dining Room:
Seems large? There appear to be several different rooms, but again, not the type of place to take an unguided tour if you’re not trying to get smacked upside the head with a serving tray. Also, diners generally appreciate not having errant asses near their faces while they’re eating.
Please rate the BOH:
Pretty good. Fine, rather eclectic menu, if not exactly adventurous. My host has one suggestion, though: "Steer clear of the pasta dishes, but the fish and meat are great."
How was the staff?
Eh. But you know, these places usually have seasonal "temps," so there goes the job-longevity incentive. To be fair, the order came out correctly, and nothing got spilled?
Oh and here’s a tip: the steak comes with fries, so don’t bother ordering a side of it. You’re welcome— cuz lord knows your waiter wasn’t about to clue you in on that one.
What did you eat?/ How was the food?
Ahi tuna sashimi : Very good, fresh, tasty. Generous portions.
Crispy calamari salad : Decent. Flavorful, nice crisp calamari for good contrasting textures. Granted, it’s hardly mind-blowing, but come on now.
Rainbow "ceviche" : It’s in "quotes" cuz it’s not really traditional ceviche, you see. Odd "market" mishmosh of fishes, but whatever. It’s fine.
Miso-glazed salmon : Fresh, tender, and succulent. Boo, it’s a wee more medium than the medium-rare "the chef recommends," but yay, the miso glaze is pretty delicious.
NY strip steak : Fine. Perfectly cooked. And the fries are good. All three orders of them.
Grilled asparagus : Very good. Farm fresh and well-prepared.
What did you like?
The food’s pretty good.
What did you dislike?
Oh who cares? It’s a beautiful summer weekend on Shelter Island.
What was your last impression?
Yay, it’s a beautiful summer weekend on Shelter Island!
Would you come back?
Sure.
Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
Thanks, and have a good night.
PX This presents THE "WORD OF MOUTH" REVIEW
We’re actually getting kinda sick of new restaurants; it’s a bit tedious pointing out the same types of flaws over and over and over again and ultimately being disappointed more often than impressed. (Here’s a novel idea: why don’t you try working to improve the shitty restaurant you already have, rather than opening a new one every nine months, you greedy egomaniacal bastard?) But hey, maybe that’s just us.
Anyhoo! It’s so nice to see you! We hadn’t planned on visiting your place, probably like— ever— but the "word of mouth" on this joint has been pretty outstanding. So, ya know— we’re intrigued. We’re hoping that good "word of mouth" is all genuine, and we can get us some of that good in our mouth. Word.
What’s that? You’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you’re hoping we’ll like it and help spread the news, since you fired your publicist long ago for not doing jack shit for you?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what obnoxious opinionated food-bloggers are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !
What exactly made you choose our restaurant?
Two friends from the industry recommended it. Women, no less— who are not even into sports. They’re very discerning; they’ve tried nearly every restaurant in their (West Village) neighborhood. (One works for Gottino, the other for Jeffrey’s Grocery.)
What was your first impression?
I’ve seen this space in nearly every carnation it’s been the last decade or so, and the layout never changes much. This one is no exception. I think they kept Charles’s wallpaper.
Please rate the Bar:
Same ole. Still pretty small. Still not so comfortable nor particularly accommodating.
Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
The ambience doesn’t exactly inspire a wine hankering, so I totally forgot to even look at the list. Oopsie! Sorry. Also, I got so intrigued by the Happy Hour 1/2 priced cocktails, I forgot to look at the beer list too. OK, shoot me, sheesh!
Out of about a half-dozen (fairly-classic-with-a-bit-of-a-twist) selections, I opted for the margarita-esque one and the punchy vodka one. And they weren’t bad. The punchy one is very sweet, though.
Please rate the Dining Room:
The banquettes are nice and cozy. The rest of it is a wee haphazard and just a tad cramped.
Please rate the BOH:
Better than you’d expect. (Those women were right!)
Reminds me very much of chef Ian Russo‘s old work at Thunder Jackson’s. Actually, I meant to ask the waitress who’s the chef, but then I forgot (I was busy enjoying the burger!).
How was the staff?
Ovarall, satisfactory. Except the busboy; he was exceptionally conscientious.
What did you eat?/ How was the food?
Fried peperoncini : Wow, different. Battered and fried pickled peppers; very smart bar food, all right. Careful though— you know that vinegary fluid that often gets trapped inside the peppers when you pull them out of the jar? Well, evidently, when that stuff gets deep-fried, it becomes really hot (as in temperature, not spiciness). And it retains that heat a good long while. Don’t burn yourself [quite frankly, the whole thing is one little ole lady short a potentially painful lawsuit]. Personally, I loved them.
Tuna tartare : OK. Fresh and light, but just a bit of overkill on the soy sauce. Sort of disappointing; my friend from Jeffrey’s Grocery had raved about this dish.
Truffle grilled cheese : Decadent and delicious, but a little more gooey cheese would really have made this sandwich lay-awake-at-night crave-worthy.
Burger with Monterey Jack : Ohh, yeah. You know that way overhyped supposedly just-like-your-backyard Shake Shack burger on the squishy grocery bun? Well, this is what it’s supposed to taste like. Ya know, like if they used fresh red onions, non-anemic tomatoes, and actually cooked it properly at your desired temperature. Minus the irritating 45-minute wait in the blistering summer sun, that is.
Red velvet cake in a glass : Eh. Skip it. Way too much (and kind of bland) frosting; dry, boring, cake smushed in between.
What did you like?
The food’s pretty good.
What did you dislike?
Sports? Rilly?
What was your last impression?
Oh damn, I forgot to ask about the (consulting?) chef. Ah well, next time.
Would you come back?
I think so.
Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
Thanks, it was delicious.
PX This presents THE "WORD OF MOUTH" REVIEW
We’re actually getting kinda sick of new restaurants; it’s a bit tedious pointing out the same types of flaws over and over and over again and ultimately being disappointed more often than impressed. (Here’s a novel idea: why don’t you try working to improve the shitty restaurant you already have, rather than opening a new one every nine months, you greedy egomaniacal bastard?) But hey, maybe that’s just us.
Anyhoo! It’s so nice to see you! We hadn’t planned on visiting your place, probably like— ever— but the "word of mouth" on this joint has been pretty outstanding. So, ya know— we’re intrigued. We’re hoping that good "word of mouth" is all genuine, and we can get us some of that good in our mouth. Word.
What’s that? You’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you’re hoping we’ll like it and help spread the news, since you fired your publicist long ago for not doing jack shit for you?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what obnoxious opinionated food-bloggers are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !
What exactly made you choose our restaurant?
I must admit, despite Cafe Gitane being a downtown institution, I’ve never had a meal here. I’ve dropped by, met friends, picked up friends, had drinks, and have even loitered at an outdoor table with a paper, a cigarette, and a cup of cafe creme— but never have I actually breakfasted, lunched, or dined.
Well, today I’m in the neighborhood, and my guest and I are hungry…
What was your first impression?
Ah, same ole Gitane…
Please rate the Bar:
Kinda N/A; it’s more like a lunch counter.
Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
Beer and wine only, and a pretty sparse (but discerning enough) selection at that. Reasonably priced— but of course, that’s why it’s an institution.
Please rate the Dining Room:
It’s fine. Distinctly European, no frills, a wee kitschy, and maybe a tad cramped. Apparently, the hipsters dig it.
Please rate the BOH:
Good. Just the (Mediterranean) basics mostly, but artfully executed and well prepared.
How was the staff?
Okay. Cute and kind of jaded, but proficient enough. I mean, what were you expecting exactly?
What did you eat?/ How was the food?
Spicy olives and oranges : Nice. Nicely balanced contrast between the spice, salty olives, and sweet fresh orange slices.
Baked feta : Good. Robust. Intense; not for salt-haters.
Smoked trout salad : Love it. Light but hearty and flavorful. Great texures. Huge.
Smoked chicken on cranberry-nut bread : Very good. Ripe mango and arugula add a noteworthy zest.
What did you like?
That’s it’s still going strong after all this time.
What did you dislike?
Am I getting older and more curmudgeonly, or are the hipsters getting uglier and more pretentious?
What was your last impression?
I’m stuffed.
Would you come back?
Sure, in probably another decade or so…
Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
Thanks! Have a nice day!
Hello there! Aww, thanks so much for the lovely messages asking about the movie recommendations! And here I thought you just didn’t love me {sniffle}.
Speaking of love, have you ever had your heart broken? Don’t be afraid to admit it, of course you have. Well! Have you ever imagined it might have been intentional? Like, a conspiracy even? That would explain everything, right? After all, who would be stupid enough to dump you?!
There’s even a film about it! This fascinating documentary gut-wrenching real-life drama hilarious comedy will have you contemplating all your past relationships; you’ll be amazed at the blatant similarities between this movie and that time you really fell hard for that totally smoking guy that you really didn’t know that well but knew instantly he was your soulmate and you’d been destined to be together forever and you moved all your stuff into his apartment within weeks of meeting and started planning your gorgeous wedding and had all your future kids’ names picked out and then not long after couldn’t figure out why suddenly out of the blue he said he needed space and he packed all your stuff in a box and shipped it to your old roommate and defriended you on Facebook and claimed to never have received any of your voicemails or text messages or the fresh-baked cookies you left on his doorstep…
Oh! Ahem sorry, got carried away for a second there. Y’know— hypothetically speaking, I mean.
Anyhoo, watch Heartbreaker! Even if, like me, you’re some kind of anomolous freak and you simply can’t relate at all to ever having you heart broken, you will so love this movie. Fer shur. I did!
= "personne extraordinaire"