PX This presents THE "WORD OF MOUTH" REVIEW
We’re actually getting kinda sick of new restaurants; it’s a bit tedious pointing out the same types of flaws over and over and over again and ultimately being disappointed more often than impressed. (Here’s a novel idea: why don’t you try working to improve the shitty restaurant you already have, rather than opening a new one every nine months, you greedy egomaniacal bastard?) But hey, maybe that’s just us.
Anyhoo! It’s so nice to see you! We hadn’t planned on visiting your place, probably like— ever— but the "word of mouth" on this joint has been pretty outstanding. So, ya know— we’re intrigued. We’re hoping that good "word of mouth" is all genuine, and we can get us some of that good in our mouth. Word.
What’s that? You’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you’re hoping we’ll like it and help spread the news, since you fired your publicist long ago for not doing jack shit for you?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what obnoxious opinionated food-bloggers are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !
What exactly made you choose our restaurant?
I must admit, despite Cafe Gitane being a downtown institution, I’ve never had a meal here. I’ve dropped by, met friends, picked up friends, had drinks, and have even loitered at an outdoor table with a paper, a cigarette, and a cup of cafe creme— but never have I actually breakfasted, lunched, or dined.
Well, today I’m in the neighborhood, and my guest and I are hungry…
What was your first impression?
Ah, same ole Gitane…
Please rate the Bar:
Kinda N/A; it’s more like a lunch counter.
Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
Beer and wine only, and a pretty sparse (but discerning enough) selection at that. Reasonably priced— but of course, that’s why it’s an institution.
Please rate the Dining Room:
It’s fine. Distinctly European, no frills, a wee kitschy, and maybe a tad cramped. Apparently, the hipsters dig it.
Please rate the BOH:
Good. Just the (Mediterranean) basics mostly, but artfully executed and well prepared.
How was the staff?
Okay. Cute and kind of jaded, but proficient enough. I mean, what were you expecting exactly?
What did you eat?/ How was the food?
Spicy olives and oranges : Nice. Nicely balanced contrast between the spice, salty olives, and sweet fresh orange slices.
Baked feta : Good. Robust. Intense; not for salt-haters.
Smoked trout salad : Love it. Light but hearty and flavorful. Great texures. Huge.
Smoked chicken on cranberry-nut bread : Very good. Ripe mango and arugula add a noteworthy zest.
What did you like?
That’s it’s still going strong after all this time.
What did you dislike?
Am I getting older and more curmudgeonly, or are the hipsters getting uglier and more pretentious?
What was your last impression?
I’m stuffed.
Would you come back?
Sure, in probably another decade or so…
Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
Thanks! Have a nice day!
Tags: F&F REVIEWS, WORD OF MOUTH REVIEWS
= "personne extraordinaire"