Word of Mouth: Shorty’s .32

March 28th, 2011 by Dick Johnson



We’re actually getting kinda sick of new restaurants; it’s a bit tedious pointing out the same types of flaws over and over and over again and ultimately being disappointed more often than impressed. (Here’s a novel idea: why don’t you try working to improve the shitty restaurant you already have, rather than opening a new one every nine months, you greedy egomaniacal bastard?) But hey, maybe that’s just us.
Anyhoo! It’s so nice to see you! We hadn’t planned on visiting your place, probably like— ever— but the "word of mouth" on this joint has been pretty outstanding. So, ya know— we’re intrigued. We’re hoping that good "word of mouth" is all genuine, and we can get us some of that good in our mouth. Word.
What’s that? You’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you’re hoping we’ll like it and help spread the news, since you fired your publicist long ago for not doing jack shit for you?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what obnoxious opinionated food-bloggers are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !


Shorty’s .32

What exactly made you choose our restaurant?
I hear raves all the time; evidently it’s a favorite amongst the industry folk (and the neighborhood locals).

What was your first impression?
Cute. Warm and cozy.

Please rate the Bar:
Pretty commodious for such a diminutive space. Welcoming and comfortable.

Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
Good. There are some interesting creative house recipe cocktails —and any place that pours Luksasowa out of the well is OK by me. Nice price, too.
The wine list could maybe use a tweak or two, but overall, a good, solid, homey watering hole.

Please rate the Dining Room:
It’s quite charming. Very smart and efficient use of the spare square footage.

Please rate the BOH:
Excellent. Not surprising considering chef Josh Eden‘s* pedigree. What’s actually more astonishing is his stalwart dedication to this humble little gem. Shouldn’t he be out chasing TV and book deals by now or something?

How was the staff?
Great. Friendly, knowledgeable, and proficient. There’s a very distinct family-like vibe going on here all right.

What did you eat?/ How was the food?
Jerusalem artichoke soup : Delicious. Rich and flavorful. I’m pretty much sold already.
Grilled shrimp salad :
Outstanding. The shrimp is perfectly cooked, tender and succulent. Clean but zesty.
Hamachi tartare : Mmm— fresh and light but luscious. Great twist on a simple classic.
Roasted chicken : Wow. I don’t generally ever order chicken in restaurants, but this one came so highly recommended I couldn’t resist. Huh, is this one of the best chickens I’ve ever had in my life? Could be.
Burger and fries : Oh man, this is one juicy and hearty burger, and the fries are great too. Huh, is this one of the best burgers I’ve ever had in my life? Could be.

What did you like?
Just about everything.

What did you dislike?
Nothing really. But if they worked on that wine list a bit, I’d think about moving in.

What was your last impression?
What a fantastic little restaurant. Really.

Would you come back?

Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
Thank you, it was a pleasure.



* Note: Josh Eden’s short-lived (joint) endeavor in healthy Chinese takeout, Ten Ten, has CLOSED.

Truth be told, despite Eden’s obvious talent and tremendous expertise, we here at PX This can’t exactly say this was entirely unforeseen (as usual). The moral of this story is:

If you think there’s an Asian foodie chef-groupie chick with a wealthy background that works in fashion and is deliberating opening a restaurant in downtown NYC— that PX This DOESN’T know — dude, you are totally smoking crack. Ha aha ha ahah maybe try asking around or something next time, bitches. Geezus.



* * * * *


Have you heard?
Until the release of PX Me (Summer 2011), this website will henceforth be updated only intermittently (approximately once or twice a week).
Abbe Diaz’s new (daily) blog is now at: abbediaz.com



Tags: , , , , ,

Leave a Reply

[in an effort to avoid "spam," comments with URLs are subject to pre-approval]

Filed Under: EAT THIS