PX This.

PX This presents THE "WORD OF MOUTH" REVIEW

We’re actually getting kinda sick of new restaurants; it’s a bit tedious pointing out the same types of flaws over and over and over again and ultimately being disappointed more often than impressed. (Here’s a novel idea: why don’t you try working to improve the shitty restaurant you already have, rather than opening a new one every nine months, you greedy egomaniacal bastard?) But hey, maybe that’s just us.
Anyhoo! It’s so nice to see you! We hadn’t planned on visiting your place, probably like— ever— but the "word of mouth" on this joint has been pretty outstanding. So, ya know— we’re intrigued. We’re hoping that good "word of mouth" is all genuine, and we can get us some of that good in our mouth. Word.
What’s that? You’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you’re hoping we’ll like it and help spread the news, since you fired your publicist long ago for not doing jack shit for you?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what obnoxious opinionated food-bloggers are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !

In-N-Out (San Francisco)

What exactly made you choose our restaurant?
Well, when you fly into San Francisco, it’s always easiest to fly outta there too (even if your final destination was elsewhere), that’s just how airlines roll.
And evidently, leaving California without a pitstop at In-N-Out is widely considered something of a travesty. So, like that.

What was your first impression?
Holy cow (oh oops haa no pun intended), it’s crowded.

Please rate the Bar:
N/A. This is a G-rated production.

Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
My "fresh-brewed" iced tea was eh. Tastes a lot like the wax cup and the plastic straw actually.

Please rate the Dining Room:
Typical. Clean, though.

Please rate the BOH:
Wow, those guys are moving. Yea, you don’t see much of that at McDonald’s.

How was the staff?
Just a tad exasperated, but they work hard.

What did you eat?/ How was the food?
Double cheeseburger : Okay. I mean don’t get me wrong, I totally appreciate the high quality, non-frozen, hand-butchered rigmarole, I really do— it’s awesome. But in terms of presentation, execution, and flavor— I still prefer Johnny Rockets, I don’t care what anyone thinks. I’m just sayin’.
Fries : Okay. I mean don’t get me wrong, I totally appreciate the high quality, non-frozen, hand-chopped rigmarole, I really do— it’s awesome. But they’re kinda bland. And a bit too flaccid.
"Fresh-brewed" Iced Tea : See above.

What did you like?
Now I get to say I’ve been here?

What did you dislike?
Dude, I don’t have anything against onions, but these stayed with me like all day, even after brushing. They’re like Super Onions.

What was your last impression?
I am glad I tried it.

Would you come back?
Sure.

Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
Thanks!

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