PX Me. (How I Became a Published Author, Got Micro-Famous, and Married a Millionaire)
When Abbe Diaz published her journal, PX This – Diary of the "Maître d’ to the Stars" [née Diary of the Potted Plant] in 2004, she’d had no idea Read more…
PX Me. (How I Became a Published Author, Got Micro-Famous, and Married a Millionaire)
When Abbe Diaz published her journal, PX This – Diary of the "Maître d’ to the Stars" [née Diary of the Potted Plant] in 2004, she’d had no idea what she was in for. Sure, she expected the process would be difficult and she might never work in the fine dining restaurant industry ever again, but she never imagined the truth could be so controversial— in a book that’s essentially about HAVING DINNER.
Despite PX This being lauded by most of her colleagues (and some of the most illustrious names in the business) as "the bible of the [NYC] industry," Diaz soon learned the politics of Food and/or "Culture" Media & PR is a game that’s dirtier than last night’s dishes. Finding herself under unjustified fire from various vastly popular and influential periodicals, news blogs, food press, online foodie communities, and other professional and aspiring writers, Diaz (a textbook Scorpio/Monkey) quickly realized [again] there were two things in her life she would never be willing to do: 1) Take unmerited bullshit, and 2) Kiss spiteful pretentious ass.
As you can probably imagine, that went over reeeally well. Mistruths, mudslinging, manipulation, misappropriation, corruption, censorship, and the tarnishing of her character— as well as the livelihoods of her friends and loved ones— are just some of the things she subsequently endured.
This is that story.
"This writing stuff is HARD." – Salman Rushdie (to friends on Facebook®)
"If you think the writing is hard, wait ’til you try the selling part. Oh, wait…" – Abbe Diaz (in response to friend, Salman Rushdie, on Facebook®)
PX Me – The Sequel to PX This
(How I Became a Published Author, Got Micro-Famous,
and Married a Millionaire)
- COMING SOON IN THE SPRING OF 2012 -
DP/Videographer: Jim Turner
Composer: Amir Salem aka Azeem
Production Assistant: Eric S. Smith
Voiceover: Brad Aldous
New Blogger: Kevin Coyle
Friend: Katina Carrao
Head Honcho: Brady Bryson
Co-Worker: Amir Salem
With cameos: Gabriel Snyder, Emily Gould, Josh Ozersky, Choire Sicha, Joshua David Stein, Ben Leventhal
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Abbe Diaz is a freelance commercial-artist, designer/dressmaker, and restaurant consultant. She has worked in the restaurant/bar industry for nearly 25 years, with numerous stints throughout the New York dining/party scene that include: Limelight, Palladium, Tunnel, Club USA, Coffee Shop, Spy, Cafe Tabac, The Strand (Miami Beach), Mercer Kitchen, Ilo, Lotus, and Theo. She served as the opening maître d’ for The Park, Smith, and 66.
She is proud to have had the opportunity to work under such nightlife arbiters as: Jean-Georges Vongerichten, Brian McNally, Jonathan Morr, Peter Gatien, Eric Goode, and Sean Macpherson.
Diaz gained a B.A. in Economics from Rutgers College, Rutgers University – New Brunswick. She was further educated as a non-matriculate Design student at the Fashion Institute of Technology, in NYC, where she currently resides.
• “The New York service industry’s Norma Rae, Abbe Diaz… the Service Industry’s Nikke Finke…” – BlackBook
• “…pure unbridled crazy batshitness…” – gawker.com
• “That is genius.” – Joel Stein, Time
For more information about PX This – Diary of the "Maître d’ to the Stars" visit http://pxthis.com/thebook
* * * * *
Have you heard?
Until the release of PX Me – The Sequel to PX This (Spring 2012), this website will henceforth be updated only intermittently (approximately once or twice a week).
Abbe Diaz’s new (daily) blog is now at: abbediaz.com
GREATEST HITS: PX This [The Blahg / The Forum]
Hi! Thank you for your "search"!
This website is currently undergoing changes as it continually progresses, so the entry for which you are seeking has likely been archived within "The Greatest Hits – PX This [The Blahg]". It was removed from its original location in preparation for the upcoming release of PX This Too (The Sequel to PX This). If you would like more information and/or further clarification on this particular narrative, please read PX This – The Revised Edition and/or PX This Too (coming soon).
And so without further ado— by popular (search engine) demand, we proudly present THE GREATEST HITS of PX This [The Blahg / The Forum]
SATURDAY, JULY 14, 2007. 12:40PM
Presenting: THE GRASSHOPPER CHRONICLES (Did Chef Jody Williams try to undermine her former boss by planting a grasshopper in a sandwich wrap?) by *Dick Johnson* – Archived at 59,823 Views
- March 20, 2007 : The saga begins here; Abbe Diaz (author, blogger, Forum launcher, "former maitre d’ to the stars" and girlfriend of Gusto Ristorante/ Centro Vinoteca /Mangia owner Sasha Muniak) comments about her dining experience at the newly opened Morandi. She writes:
"…i’ve pretty much refrained from commenting about Morandi, mostly because maybe it’s like too personal or some shit, but i must say that place works my every last nerve.
the thing i find utterly retarded is
clearly they have opted to keep some of the same things that still currently appear on the Gusto menu. okay fine all well and good. except
if you happen to comment on it (like to the bartender for example) they get all irritated and indignant like it’s APPALLING you would even mention it. i mean for fuck’s sake, if that’s the decision you make, i think you’d better get a fucking sense of humor about it…."
The entire comment remains here. (It’s definitely worth a read!)
- App. 5 hours later, a new Forum registrar logged-in as "Brook" responds, "I worked for hair plug muniak and it is going to be a pleasure to see him fail. Proper question on Gusto is why didn’t the new chef change the menu? Obviously Williams will cook what she learned in the 6 years she spent in Italy (only self taught female Italian chef in America) and just like Giorione and Il Buco, Gusto will not be about the food for long."
- Abbe immediately answers "Brook":
oh YEAAAH that’s what i’m talkin bout. i’m like a proud bricklayer right now– this place was built to keep it "real"
YOUR PUBLICIST CANNOT HELP YOU HERE MISS THING
a: name calling, "Brook" ?? yah that’s mature
b: and thanks for making my point. my point WAS:
who gives a shit what Williams cooks where. but WHY get all pissy if the patrons bring it up ?? did you REALLY think NOBODY was going to comment on the fact the menu is similar. get serious
c: AS IF Morandi is about the FOOD. aha ha ha hahah haaa that’s a good one.
d: sorry but Gusto was never about the fucking FOOD either. at least not to me, it wasn’t. and there was a time i was there at least once or twice a week.
i went first for the location. THEN the bar (it’s actually quite nice). THEN i kept going back so often because of artan.
e: yeah i bet you’d love to "see him fail." it’s called ENVY.
why don’t you do us all a favor and try holding your breath.
(**note: Abbe later clarifies, under this very same topic "…need i remind you this entire ‘drama’ was precipitated by a ‘validating member’ named ‘Brook.’ i will not tell you HOW i come to have very strong personal opinions on this matter, but perhaps it would behoove you to inquire, from someone with some technological experience, just how these interweb website forum thingies work exactly," essentially implying she has some behind-the-scenes knowledge regarding the true identity of "Brook.")
- The following day, March 21, 2007 – (the first of several unfavorable Morandi reviews) Steve Cuozzo of The NY Post declares Morandi a dud.
- The very next day, March 22, 2007 – A "dubious" photograph of a grasshopper in a sandwich wrap at Sasha Muniak’s Mangia (on 57th St) appears anonymously in the inbox of eater.com
- The Morandi topic in this Forum progresses, as several commenters begin to imply the grasshopper incident is not a coincidence, having come so closely on the heels of Brook’s pejorative comment.
[**Worth noting: It was eater.com that first "broke the story" of chef Jody Williams leaving Gusto for Morandi establishing at least one prior correspondence between them.]
- Gawker.com "picks up" the item, stressing the similarity in menus between Gusto and Morandi.
- Almost immediately, eater.com attacks Abbe Diaz
The Eater "item" contains several falsehoods and inaccuracies (which are then brilliantly addressed and refuted by a PX This Forum Administrator/"Publicist.")
- The next day, eater.com concedes its misrepresentation–> http://ny.eater.com/archives/2007/03/who_is_abbe_dia.php
- Within the subsequent forum discussions, industry rumors surrounding Morandi, Keith McNally, Jody Williams (and Williams’ apparent friendship with eater.com’s Ben Leventhal) and her former boss, Sasha Muniak, begin to emerge.
It culminates with a Page Six parody, "JUST ASKING….
What tantrum throwing, egomaniacal hotspot chef is so psycho, it’s possible she tried to derail her former boss by resorting to sabotage? One day after the anonymous comment, "…it is going to be a pleasure to see him fail" appeared on an online restaurant industry insider forum, a mysterious, questionable, dubious photograph of an insect in a particular food item sold by said former boss (and current competitor), suddenly showed up at eater.com. What are the odds?"
- The next day, Jody Williams’ live-in girlfriend, Diana, registers for the PX This Forum and replies:
"I can say with 100% certainty that Jody has never been associated with any posting to this site. When Jody was asked by one of her cooks did you put a grasshopper in a Mangia wrap?’ she giggled and asked him what he was talking about. When she decided to leave Gusto, she telephoned Amanda Freitag and asked her if she wanted her job because she respected her as a chef and was friendly with her. In addition, opposed to much of the chatter on this site, she enjoyed working for Sasha Muniak saying on many occasions to me that he was one of the best bosses she ever had (I too like his gentle soul and really had a strong bond with his son Alexei). It appears that a lot of the posts written on this site are from the front of the house staff at Gusto who may have had run-ins with her. Its sad because I know when push comes down to shove she really did like everyone and enjoyed the two years that she spent there. She has been working extremely long hours without a day off in months getting her kitchen up to her standards. I also know that going from a restaurant that does 200 covers a night to close to 400 covers there is a lot of stress in sending out food that meets her standard. Does she yell? What chef doesn’t. Sorry I’m ranting on about this but it really is upsetting to see someone you love and respect be put over the ringer."
- Diaz responds:
hi Diana,
we’ve never met but i have heard of you through our mutual acquaintances, i’ve been told you are kind and sweet and very nice. i understand very much how upsetting it is to see "someone you love and respect" being spoken of in this manner. perhaps maybe now you understand my gut response to the commenter signed in as "Brook." i fully appreciate what you are saying, and am very grateful you took the time, energy, and effort to come here and address this issue.
i hope you appreciate my stance as well, i believe everyone is entitled to their say. i do not know whether this news will be unsettling to you or not, but i can assure you the majority of the commenters in this thread are NOT Gusto FOH staff, as i do happen to know several of the "members" personally, either having met in person, or through extensive correspondence over the last several months (i can’t speak for them ALL, as there are certainly members here whose identities i do not know). you may find this hard to believe, but it’s my experience that it is actually the Gusto staff who is most reluctant to discuss these matters, either here or in person. as i have mentioned, even i no longer dine at Gusto, as i have had personal problems of my own with the FOH staff.
you claim to know with "100% certainty" that chef-williams has no association with any posting here. i respect your conviction, but ask that you extend me the same courtesy when i reply to the contrary– i’m sorry, but it is my belief you are wrong.
as for chef-williams, she is now in the (unfortunate?) situation of being a "celebrity," and i do mean that in the strictest definition of the word. by virtue of her self-imposed foray into the limelight, she is now subject to scrutiny and all the consequences that go along with it. i think everyone that has commented here has been quite fair (unlike eater.com’s initial response), particularly in specifying their opinions are purely speculation and hearsay, and encouraging readers to form their own conclusions. i am VERY PROUD of those who have chosen to comment here, as it is my (vast) personal experience the internet CAN be a daunting and malicious place, often inspiring people to vociferate their worst, secure in their anonymity.
thank you again, and all the best to you and ms. williams.
- Fast forward several months, to a new Forum discussion of the impending opening of Sasha Muniak’s Centro Vinoteca with chef Anne Burrell (located mere blocks from McNally/Williams’ Morandi)
- Again, industry rumors emerge, this time involving Muniak’s offspring, who are, in short, said to be rambunctious, "arrogant", "unappreciative" and far too garrulous, to be good for Centro’s "image" amongst those who are, shall we say, esoterically informed.
- Eater.com jumps all over it, declaring, "Right Under Diaz’s Nose, the Worm Turns on Muniak." (June 28, 2007)
- (Forum Orator Extraordinaire) *Dick Johnson* observes, "LOL. When it comes to us, I think Eater (read: Ben Leventhal) would put a ‘negative spin’ on it, if we all got together and cured cancer."
- July 10, 2007- Eater.com "unveils" Centro Vinoteca
Within the comments section, a reader posts a disdainful remark about Muniak’s family, and signs it "Dick Johnson." A second commenter responds by attacking the PX This Forum, claiming "hating" and "drama" are "predictable" here.
- Immediately, the real *Dick Johnson* of PX This emphatically denies posting that comment. He writes:
"OK, I’m pissed.
I did not write that comment, and I think whoever did, is a ball-less cocksucker.
First of all, I have never hated on Centro or Gusto- I have nothing but the utmost respect and admiration for Abbe’s boyfriend (whatever his name is).
And if I had to guess, I would say a certain jealous, shit-eating chef, had everything to do with signing my "name" to that comment. Why don’t you go feed your fucking pet grasshoppers, you bitch."
- Abbe Diaz forwards that denial to eater.com, but is then accused of being an Abbe Diaz imposter.
- After a slight tumultuous anti-Centro wave descends on the PX This Forum, the rally behind Muniak begins to re-shape after a (cute and happy) member named *Ferret-n-Chicken!* reminds and suggests, "just think about how everybody says Sasha is a really nice guy, and also I know I’m definitely curious to see what that Iron chef chick can do!!!"
- Less than 2 hours later, William’s girlfriend reappears and comments,
"You guys are really a bunch of assholes. I said it before and I’ll say it again, Jody doesn’t read reviews, go on blogs etc. I don’t know why I care but I do. People tell me consider the source with this site but I don’t listen to them. Jody quit Gusto and gave unlimited notice. Jody replaced herself in the kitchen. It took three people to replace her…the chef at gusto, sarah at Mangia and Anne at Centro. (thanks to Mark Latner because he wasn’t interested so he referred Sasha to her). Sorry guys but Morandi is not a failure, Jody could cook when Sasha asked her to stay and she can cook now. Morandi’s front of the house is run better than any establishment that Jody has worked in NYC. And for the last time, Jody is way too busy at Morandi to go online with some bullshit fake name and verbally abuse Gusto/Mangia/Centro. Perhaps Craig was right when he said that the only way that Abbe Diaz can get attention on this blog is to stir up fake controversy. Every f’n subject seems to mention Jody. Seriously, are you insane?
Good thing that Giorgio didn’t get one of his lackies to attack Jody when Sasha lured her away from him.
Simply Unbelievable.
- Diaz responds:
sigh
hi diana
nice to see you again
and again, i will say as well, i welcome your input as i do all others.
i appreciate your anger, as i’m sure i would react strongly (in probably a similar manner), given the circumstances.
but
everyone here is entitled to their opinion too. and if you’ll notice (as i did) not one person has used jody’s name in this thread. i believe that is an act of sincere consideration that proceeded completely unprompted, even by me.
as for my alleged attempts to "get attention" by stirring up "fake controversy"
well. need i remind you this entire "drama" was precipitated by a "validating member" named "Brook." i will not tell you HOW i come to have very strong personal opinions on this matter, but perhaps it would behoove you to inquire, from someone with some technological experience, just how these interweb website forum thingies work exactly.
i am going to leave it at that, because BELIEVE IT OR NOT, this particular subject is starting to become rather tiresome to me as well.
all the best to you and ms.williams
if you have any further questions and/or comments, i am happy to accommodate them.
all i ask is you please refrain as best you can from calling my members "assholes." although i’m sure their skins are rather thick and can withstand whatever animosity you can muster.
oh and by the way
personally, as a rather knowledgeable and vastly experienced former member of the F&B industry, i would have to say i think most of your above assertations are a bunch of bullshit.
but whatever
OH
one other last thing
you can tell craig i said: "wait til i see that mutherfukker"
cuz he wrote me an e-mail recently telling me he sweats me. seriously
so if he is going around talking hypocritical shit about me behind my back
i will totally punch him in the fucking shoulder. HARD.
CAN SOMEBODY PASS THE FUCKING POPCORN OVER HERE NOW geezus christ
- Within minutes, eater.com declares Abbe Diaz is having a "meltdown."
- Fast forward several months to December, 2007. Sasha Muniak receives an e-mail from Jody Williams insisting he "rein in" his girlfriend or suffer the consequences.
- Abbe Diaz is livid. However, she concedes:
… i admit i am making an assumption. is there a possibility that comment COULD have been posted by someone else? of course. there’s always a possibility.
so here is my suggestion, and maybe this will appease everybody involved:
- SOMEONE posted that comment. all the speculations raised by the members here regarding that comment are primarily based on the IP address. well, if i was accused of posting a comment i did not write (that was supossedly written by one of my FANS), i can tell you i would be hell-bent on finding the person who is ruining my reputation by writing that awful snide comment.
- i would take the IP address. i would call the company to which the address is registered. if i happened to discover LO AND BEHOLD that IP address happens to come from the VERY SAME COMPANY in which i work (or used to work maybe? whatever) — ??
- i would find my "colleague," make him/her reveal his/her identity (or i would do it myself) and then i’d probably shake the shit out of that "fan" of mine. then i’d make that colleague publicly apologize to all involved for creating such a goddamned ruckus. i’d probably even call my good pals over at Eater and ask them to help spread the word farther and wider: "I AM INNOCENT."
(hells, i would even bet all the members here would apologize for all their speculations, if proven wrong. quite frankly, i would MAKE THEM APOLOGIZE.)
that’s what i would do.
i got the IP address if anybody wants it. just ask for it.
- To this day, neither Jody Williams nor Diana nor eater.com has made any attempt to acquire the aforementioned IP address, belonging to "Brook." Isn’t that funny?
We still have it, if anybody wants it. Feel free to e-mail us — or wait until the release of PX Me – The Sequel to PX This if you just wanna read about it — coming in the Spring of 2012!
- As predicted by the members of PX This months prior, in August of 2007, Jody Williams signs on as chef/partner of Gottino, (located within the several blocks between Gusto and Morandi).
- As predicted by the members of PX This months prior, in May of 2008, Chef Jody William is unceremoniously dismissed from Morandi.
- The LATEST: As "scooped" by PX This, in September of 2009, Jody Williams is sued by Gottino partner Michael Bull and is subsequently ousted from Gottino in May of 2010.
Grasshopper murder suspect "Brook" remains at large…
**See also (earlier): "[ Jody Willams ] @ Morandi"
*********************************************************************
pxthis.com archives
This is an abbreviated version of the PX This blog entry on July 14, 2007, for archival purposes only. A far more detailed, thorough, and incisive account is to be included in Diaz’s upcoming second book, PX Me – The Sequel to PX This) – Coming Soon in the Spring of 2012
"…The intellectual community, as usual, showed itself to be timid and divided, and even the most unexpected graphologists engaged in controversies regarding their inconsistent analyses of my handwriting. It was they who divided opinions, overheated the polemic, and made nostalgia popular…. Make no mistake: peaceful madmen are ahead of the future." – Gabriel García Márquez
Lately, it has come to our attention that the link to the original “Good Night, Mr. Lewis” story on Abbe Diaz is permanently defunct, possibly due to Steve Lewis’s defection last year from Joonbug to BlackBook magazine. Due to popular demand, we hereby re-create the entire article but, for the sake of clarity, verity and comprehension, have taken the liberty of editing those portions in which the original was remiss (a copy of the article in its original un-edited state is currently hosted here).
Abbe Diaz: Talk Loudly And Carry A Big Stick…Too (Part Three)
Over the past two days I’ve spoken with Abbe Diaz (see part one and part two). Continue after the jump for the third and final part of my conversation with Abbe.
Steve Lewis: Did you miss me?
Abbe Diaz: Of course, I miss you everyday. Well not anymore, cuz now I can read all about you. That Down by the Hipster thing was so funny.
SL: Did you see what I wrote.
AD: I did.
SL: No, you didn’t, you saw what he made me write. I’m a mellow guy now. Josh was right, I took the high road. It did make me laugh. My girl teased me about it.
AD: Oh, you have it light. If you had any clue what people say about me, to me, at me.
SL: So you were talking about what people say about you. Tell me why anybody would attack you?
AD: Good fucking question.
OK, honestly I know the answer; it’s just a snowball thing.
SL: You attacked the powers that be. If you attack someone in his castle he will throw stones down upon you forever.
AD: Maybe.
SL: OK, you tell me, why? Why are you being attacked?
AD: I sort of narrowed it down to episodes here and there. They do snowball. It’s very small communities, these writer— blogger— shitheads.
JoonBug: People like Gawker and Eater.
AD: What happens is one of them says something bullshittish and I’m supposed to be like "Whatever." But, I’m not— I’m like, "Fuck you."
SL: Eater is this big website; Ben Leventhal is the guy’s name.
AD: Giant Ass. Apparently from what I gather there are a couple of partners. One guy is cool, he’s totally cool, but the other one, what is his problem?
SL: Good Cop, Bad Cop?
AD: No, he’s just an ass.
SL: What I meant was sometimes in business one guy’s really nice and one guy’s a real asshole, and the good guy can always say, "Hey, I’d love to do it, but my partner won’t." That’s good cop, bad cop. Maybe Ben is the bad cop in their relationship.
AD: Mmm… you know it’s kind of a misunderstanding, but not really a misunderstanding. I launched the forum on like March 14th, and the following day there was some stuff about some restaurant. It just so happened that that chef of that restaurant wants to come to the industry forum— and that’s what it’s there for— and vent, you know, about some shit. So that’s fine, vent— but it just so happened that she was venting about the man I’m dating. Check that shit out, isn’t that crazy? That’s like cosmic freakiness. So she goes and she spouts blah blah blah. Now just picture it, someone comes on your blog to your little comment section and says nasty things about your girlfriend. Wouldn’t you be upset?
SL: Not me, ‘cause I know my girl. She’s 5’11” and she will knock the motherfucker out.
AD: But he won’t knock someone out, that’s the problem, he’s a lover not a fighter… Then of course this whole thing gets blown up all out of proportion and it gets found out that that chef is friends with Ben Leventhal…
…What he does [with Eater] now, I don’t agree with… what we do is different, I don’t have ads on my site, I’m not a business, I am a "blog" in the purest sense. I don’t make any money on it, so if I use my blog as my voice then hey, that’s what it’s there for. But, he uses this supposedly objective website for his own personal agenda, and to me there’s just something not quite right about that. Or if you are going to do that at least have the balls to put it right out there and sign your name to it.
SL: I’m going to disagree with you. I say a blog is your personal agenda.
AD: OK, some. In yours, in mine.
SL: I’m saying, just because they’re making money at it doesn’t mean that they can’t have a personal agenda too.
AD: OK, that’s fine. Then be honest about it. Say, look, this is my problem, I don’t like you cuz such and such said this about so and so, and that person’s my friend.
SL: But, that’s your job, because you’re the one who exposes these things. Down By The Hipster, they’re the ones who are exposing these things. Guys like me, I don’t really expose too much, I try not to gossip. You can do it, you can bang back at him. Why don’t you bang back at him?
AD: Oh, I do. But that’s what so annoying— cuz it’s like he doesn’t just attack me, he attacks the people and the places and the events around me, which is not right. You don’t go and fuck with innocent people’s shit just because you have a fucking problem… Watch, I’m going to take so much shit for this. I know it.
SL: Well do you want us to print this or not?
AD: Oh I don’t know. On the one hand I don’t care, on the other hand, I’m so tired of this nonsense.
SL: Let me tell you something about you. I think you’re hot, I think you’re a beautiful girl. But, the hottest thing about Abbe Diaz is she’s got balls and she’s got brains and she’s never going to take shit.
AD: Who would? If somebody gets all in your shit, who’s gonna be like, "Eh."
SL: Most of the world, Abbe. Most of the world takes shit from other people. You get out there and write a book, that’s why you’re controversial because you don’t take shit. The rest of the world takes shit. I don’t take shit too much, well much more than I used to…
AD: I don’t think people take shit, I just think that they’re not up front about not taking their shit. What’s it called? Passive aggressive.
SL: But you get in people’s faces.
AD: You know— look, if someone attacks you, you’re going to slap them back, right across the face. That’s the part that I don’t understand— cuz, like— me, I slap back and they go, "Oh my god, we totally started it, but can you believe she slapped us back?! She’s awful, what a bitch crazy nut job."
SL: Abbe, you are a fighter, and that’s why you’re relevant and that’s why I’m interviewing you today.
AD: But you watch, mark my words. You’ve been doing so well and who’s this kid, the one on Gawker that likes you so much, Hamilton Nolan.
SL: I don’t know.
AD: He’s fucking in love with you. And then I’ve seen you on Grub Street, Josh Ozersky, whatever, I guess he kinda likes you too. Guaranteed, mark my words, this interview will never hit either one of those blogs. This interview, no fucking way.
SL: Because they don’t like you so therefore you’re irrelevant, is that what you’re saying? Look, if you said something Ghandi-esque, or incredibly beautiful, earth shattering, you don’t think it would appear anywhere?
AD: Are you joking? Totally… Josh Stein, that jerk face, do you know who that is?
JoonBug: No.
AD: He used to write for Gawker, and now he does cameos covering that Top Chef thing. He said the most awful thing about me with a full on post with my picture and everything, and all of it was untrue. So, I turn around and I’m like you mother fucker, none of that is true. Even New York magazine’s Grub Street proved him wrong.
SL: So you got your point across using your blog and your side was told.
AD: Basically, I guess. But then, essentially as an answer to what he said, I pulled out this beautiful Gabriel Garcia Marquez quote— do you ever think it saw the light of day? They should have retracted or updated or something.
SL: Now what did you do?
AD: They accused me of being another anonymous blogger… It turns out we’re friendly now, because it was just such a hilarious thing. So they accused me of being her, and it was flat out proven that that blogger was not me. In fact, her story is ten times more interesting than mine, she’s like the "three million dollar bartender" from Boston, you know.
SL: What is a three million dollar bartender?
AD: She got a three million dollar tip to go open her own place.
SL: She must have made a great drink.
AD: Ha haa, I ain’t going there… She’s a friend of mine, sorry… So they accused me of being that blogger, because she was blogging some hilarious things about some people. So they were like, "there goes bashit crazy Abbe Diaz again…" But then when it comes out in the open that it’s not me, you think they would be like, "My bad, it wasn’t Abbe Diaz after all," wouldn’t you?
SL: It’s not like the papers, which is a slower medium, this blog stuff moves fast.
AD: All they would have to do, like they do with so many other stories, is update. An "update" is a very standard thing for bloggers to do.
SL: Well let’s update it right now. Oh, I guess we did we just did.
AD: Do you really think this is going to be on Gawker tomorrow? No way! This is my point, my simple point. Your question, "What if I were to say something beautiful?" — Well, this is a prime example, I did say something beautiful— I was using somebody else’s words, but I was so proud of myself on that rebuttal, I was patting myself on the back. Did anyone ever see it? On my blog, sure.
SL: Let me say something. Abbe you’re an incredible person. I sweat you. I think you’re the coolest. You are beautiful, dynamic, unbelievable, and I’m really glad my readers will get to know you.
AD: Thank you Steve Lewis. But, it’s all for naught. You’ll see.
…
I am a neophyte in this world of blogs. I did get my dander up a few times when something said about me seemed unfair. Maybe I haven’t gotten big enough here to be attacked as Abbe seems to be attacked. The blogosphere fascinates me. I come from a different place. You booked an act or party, you printed an invite, and you had all these kids standing on corners near clubs handing them out, and then that night you opened the doors, the people come, you had a party, and at the end of the night you counted the money. Rinse and repeat. There was a physical connect with the consumer through that flyer and there was time to think, as events were promoted at least a week in advance. Pauses could be taken for breaths, reflections, or even diversions. It’s so fast now. I write this, press the send button, and in an hour you read it. Text messaging redirects consumers from one club to another in the middle of the party. Cell phone calls and emails reach countless masses instantly. I get fifty invites a day to parties happening tonight, tomorrow or sometimes in an hour.
Silicon and plastic have created a distance between the club operator and the consumer. Even if you wanted to punch someone in the nose it would just be an image on MySpace or Facebook and the impact and satisfaction just wouldn’t be the same.
Good Night,
Mr. Lewis
Interview conducted and written by Steve Lewis.
Interview has been edited and condensed.
a blogger (that’s me) and two restaurateurs walk into a bar…
… order some drinks (one of them likes "white wine with a few ice cubes." go figure.), get a little tipsy, and —what else?— start gossiping like a bunch of sewing bee bitches. it went down a little something like this:
one of them was late. personally i think he just completely forgot our appointment and hopped into a taxicab right when he got my text message. hey, it happens (quite a lot in NYC, actually). which was fine cuz i needed a drink anyways. it gave me some time to peruse my environs there in theAceHotel lobby. it’s pretty neat in that chic trendy modern retro modern whatever kind of way. and the waitress is really nice.
there are a lot of "locals" and familiar faces and whatnot, so i am assuming peoples are traveling a ways from wherever they live to get here which is pretty impressive. on the stroll over, a block away i started asking myself who the hells is coming out here to stay in a hotel, it’s ridiculous. well there ended up being a lot of people around so it just goes to show how much i know.
then the other restaurateur arrived so that was great. he’s very cute and jovial and he dresses like a little kid. we sat around and chitchatted about the hotel, and then he asked the waitress to bring out the funky little snacks in the plastic baggies. these are little goodie bags filled with stuffs made by april-bloomfield, like caramel corn and salted almonds and salt&vinegar chips…. and chiccharón (! puertochinos, holla). it’s a good idea because apparently the kitchen is behind schedule what with contractor issues and things, so it’s pretty smart to have at least something for bar patrons.
evidently a Stumptown Coffee place just opened here— which is a big deal apparently, it’s like some coffee cultists’ favorite from seattle or someplace. supposedly it’s quite busy already with lines at the door "at 6AM." so good for them.
subsequently that sparked this big discussion about coffee and whether or not LaColombe "is better."
then we started all the really good gossip and
wooo child. lemme tell you. harharaharrr ben-leventhal would kiss keith-mcnally’s jock strap to get a lick of the dish i got last night, honey.
sigh but you see this is my problem
when i first envisioned doing this blog feature "story" whatever thingie, i imagined it might be called "An Evening With: …" and then i just go out and about with all the really cool peoples i usually see, but now when they start to give me the usual "offff the record, abbbeeeee" bullshit i would just tell them to stick it up their asses this time.
obviously i am full of it, cuz i am not about to go spilling all the beans— it’s not stuff i know first hand so i’m not really sure how much of it is true or how much of it to believe anyhow. like for example, there was this one story about frank-bruni’s recent party at theSpottedPig, and supposedly there was some discourse about his former review process wherein frank-bruni called himself a consummate "professional" and HAHAHAHAHAA that one is just entirely too preposterous to swallow.
oh there was also some blabber about joshua.david-stein too. because he wrote something about something something "used to own Gusto" something (?), and i don’t know if that kid is just dumb as a rock or what.
oh! ohhh but the big news! i’m not going to say. nyeeah.
you wouldn’t believe me anyways, bceause everybody always just wants to believe what they want to believe. but haa ahaa believe me if i get so much as a sense of a whiff of an inkling i am about to get "scooped" or whatever, i will so bust that shit wide the fuck open (as usual, bitches)! so you may want to stay tuned just in case!
YAH SO
theBreslin is set to open probably "october first." it’s about 150 seats. it has a big open kitchen. it will have two bars— a large one (directly on the left if you enter from the street) that’s an antique "purchased in harlem." there will be a "bar rail" opposite with small tables lined down the center.
there’s a "grandfathered" mezzanine level as well, with a smaller (also antique) bar. there are refrigerated wine racks lining the wall, and there will be an "owner’s nook that looks down on everything" off in the corner at the end of the wine racks.
downstairs will be "banquettes banquettes more banquettes" and one (or two?) with "a curtain" cuz he "always wanted to do that."
the floor and (16 foot high, ornately molded) ceiling are "original."
and a "big round" table in the middle right in front of the kitchen.
i think it will end up looking quite beautiful. so the only thing the persistently pessimistic perfectionist in me can think to say is: i didn’t notice if there’s a built-in vestibule but i hope so cuz otherwise it looks like it could be potentially mad freezing up front in the wintertime.
i also got to meet the other restaurateur’s brother and a friend of his from london. they were nice.
yay!
• Here’s at least one benefit of the recession. According to a 25-year professional Waste Management veteran, the dramatic increase in businesses closing (and employees losing their jobs) has resulted in less waste. He approximates his routes alone collect about "20,000 less tons of trash " per week.
• Idiohack Ben Leventhal attempts to instruct restaurant patrons on "How to be a Regular." Unfortunately, his advice is a load of crap. Oh ha, "crap" ha! There’s a joke about trying to be "regular" somewhere in there! Probably. - Vanilla Ice
• Steve Lewis updates us on his feud with Todd English (wherein he "pulled an Abbe Diaz" (!) – his words). - Inkslinger
• Famke Janssen was spotted twice this week (because she’s a total stalker). First on Bleecker and 6th Ave (walking by the fountain) looking cute in trendy casual cargo shorts and a lovely jaunty fedora. Homegirl must be a bit of a klutz though, constantly bumping into low furnitures and whatnot, seeing as her (long! thin!) legs were looking a wee bit bruised and purply.
Our second encounter found her dining at MeKong with a diminutive female friend. Ms. Janssen didn’t seem to mind at all that the air conditioner above her head was dripping all over the table (which we had just abandoned prior, specifically for that reason). She also really loves her dog. He’s an adorable stout puggish slightly overweight nearly cross-eyed little thing, but Ms. Janssen reached down and scooped up all 15 or so pounds of him, and dined with him ensconced in her lap for the entire rest of her meal. Aww.
And if that scarf and handbag she was rockin are really actually from a street vendor like they purport, well— go on with yer bad self, Famke.
You look fabulous!
• Idiohack Ben Leventhal (characteristically) swings joyously from Keith McNally’s testicles as he announces the news McNally will team with Nate Appleman on their new soon-to-open pizzeria project. - Dick Johnson
• Our intrepid heroine takes on (Idiohack Wonder Twins) Joshua David Stein and Josh Ozersky — where else? — in the comment section of New York Magazine’s GrubStreet. A Must Read! You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, it’s better than Moby Dick. - Dick Johnson
• Anna Wintour offspring, Bee Shaffer with dad, David Shaffer — spotted walking into "the phone store" on 6th Ave (where everrrrybody fabulous buys/services their cellular phones) to inquire about — what else? — new cellular phones.
Oh, WHICH "phone store" you ask?
Well, if you have to ask, you must not be fabulous? In which case, Mike the phone store owner responds, "Puhleese. I have enough [overbearing, annoying, demanding, rich luddite moron] customers on my hands. Thanks, but no thanks." Evidently, Mike pays mucho moola in rent for his tiny store in its swanky location. He doesn’t mind the trickle — a flood he definitely doesn’t need. If you require his services, you’ll find him.
• Blogger Choire Sicha breaks the news about (his former boyfriend) Frank Bruni’s replacement at The New York Times. Aww….(?).
Heh, jerkfaced Gawker commentators who typically swing from Sicha’s testicles (since he used to blog for Gawker) didn’t even know Choire Sicha once dated Frank Bruni! Because, despite all their pretensions, a lot of Gawker commentators are just ignorant fucking idiots. - Vanilla Ice
• Adam Platt files his review of Graydon Carter’s Monkey Bar.
"… ‘I’m not supposed to say,’ the waiter whispered, before explaining, with a conspiratorial grin, that the front-room staff at Mr. Carter’s restaurant had been asked to sign confidentiality agreements when taking their jobs…."
Thanks a lot, Abbe. I guess other aspiring waiter cum memoirists are just shit outta luck, huh? - Vanilla Ice
= "personne extraordinaire"