PX This presents THE F&F REVIEW
Hey, sorry we couldn’t make it to "Friends&Family," we were out of town/ had to work/ not invited. We’re really glad we finally managed to come by, though— it’s so nice to see you!
What’s that? You would still like us to take the time to fill out the F&F survey, because you’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you invited 75 people to F&F, and afterward all you got was 41 "Congrats[es]!" 22 "Awesome[s]!" 3 "Ciao[s]!" and 9 "Best of luck[s]!" ?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what friends & family are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !
What was your first impression?
Huh. Well… it’s certainly no Juliet, ha ha ahaa.
Please rate the Bar:
Nice. Big, welcoming, commodious.
Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
They’re still in soft-open mode, so they haven’t quite settled in yet. But they have Belvedere! And fat juicy olives. What more do you need?
Oh but, my certified-sommelier friend hated her sauvignon blanc by the glass, so hopefully they’re working on that. I’m just sayin’.
Please rate the Dining Room:
Larger than you’d expect. There’s actually an anteroom, then a dining room, then a private dining room (seats about 20), then apparently another private private dining room beyond the first private dining room (still in the works).
Please rate the BOH:
Good. Simple but straightforward gastropubby type menu. Appetizers and entrees for now— bar menu, daily specials, and dessert "coming soon."
How was the staff?
Decent. Proficient and conscientious, but with just a dash of ennui. Ya know, hip and confident— imported from downtown.
What did you eat?/ How was the food?
Artichoke dip : Very good. Rich and delicious. A+
Burger : Top-notch. Perfectly cooked, hearty, juicy, and flavorful. Great presentation. Excellent fries (Sysco?).
Fish and Chips : Tasty. Crisp but fluffy. Not too greasy. Perfect portion. Same great fries.
Steamed mussels : Tender and succulent, but why such a congested little bowl? More broth, please!
Chicken wings : Eh, okay. Typical "buffalo" style. Sorry, but once you go Korean, there’s no coming back. (Generous serving, though.)
What did you like?
That dip was pretty slammin.
What did you dislike?
Nothing really. Oh wait sorry, my friend really did not like that wine.
What was your last impression?
Ha haa, seriously— I’m kinda curious what the story is here. Anyone who knows Artan Gjoni (and that’s just about everyone who’s anyone, yea?) knows that boy is impossible to talk to.
Would you come back?
Even though it’s kinda out of the way… probably.
Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
Thanks, Artan! It was nice seeing you too.
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For more on Artan Gjoni, read PX Me – The Sequel to PX This. Coming soon in the Summer of 2011.
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Have you heard?
Until the release of PX Me (Summer 2011), this website will henceforth be updated only intermittently (approximately once or twice a week).
Abbe Diaz’s new (daily) blog is now at:
The Blabber in the Trenches
• Longtime operators Aymeric Clemente and Remi Laba have been ousted from Bagatelle, Kiss & Fly, and RDV. Apparently ejected on the night before Christmas, the duo, despite their partnership agreement and impressive track record (earnings at Bagatelle are estimated in the $8M per year range), have been summarily dismissed without warning or justification. The two are expected to pursue legal recourse.
Bagatelle, Kiss & Fly, and RDV are not affiliated with their other undertakings, Villa Pacri and La Petite Maison.
• Legendary F&B Superstar Artan Gjoni‘s new venture is in soft-open mode. Albert Hall Tavern is located at 508 9th Ave between 38th and 39th Streets. Tell ‘im we sent you. Ha ha haa, no actually—- don’t.
• Chronic cool dude and nightlife impresario Armin Amiri is slated to open his new enterprise someplace "in Chinatown." We’d tell you where, but then we’d have to kill you. (Stay tuned.)
• Which newest enterprise is the top contender for the industry’s famous and sagacious Dead In Eight [months] award? News is already trickling in from "Friends & Family," and the forecast isn’t pretty. (Don’t quit your day job.) Place your bets!
• Friday, October 23, 8:57PM – "@ Blue Ribbon Sushi right now Chelsea Clinton sitting next table over!"
• Saturday, October 24, 10:00PM – Eric Goode and Emil Varda at The Bon Bon (née The Boom Boom) "just checking out the digs" and saying hello to Andre Balazs. When asked to confirm Artan Gjoni‘s (earlier) assertion that Juliet Supper Club is housed "in the former Area" space, Eric Goode replied, "What? Where? Twenty first street? No way."
• Monday, October 19, 2:30PM – Sante D’Orazio lunching outdoors at Bar Pitti. Also, Merv Matheson (not together).
• Tuesday, October 20, 2:00PM – Mark Baker and Artan Gjoni lunching outdoors at Gusto Ristorante e Bar Americano.
• Admit it, you couldn’t have cared less about Juliet, the new Todd English helmed restaurant/lounge reportedly opening someplace in Chelsea.
Well, it turns out your hosts are Mark Baker and Artan Gjoni. All of a sudden you care just a little bit now, don’t you?
• Speaking of Todd English— for fuck’s sake, enough already. But, since the inbox here at PX This clearly won’t get a reprieve until it’s addressed, we’ll go ahead and finally fucking address it—
Dear Todd,
Personally, we think you come off as a bit of a tool. Quite frankly, we are so utterly discerning, insightful and knowledgeable, that your culinary antics (and/or entire career) usually fall way below our reproachful radar. Thus, the entirety of our commentary can best summarily be expressed in the sagacious words of our founder (coincidentally, a striking Asian woman, in case you didn’t know):
"I bet that cures him of his Yellow Fever Malaria HA HA HA AHAH HAHAHAHAHAAA."
Best,
Pee Ex This Dot Com
• Yoo hoo, Foster Kamer! We "MENSA[sic] -level Vikings" are still waiting for you to come and show us how intellectually deficient we are. We’re quivering in our boots! Please, oh mighty blogger cum twice-fired reservationist cum semi-employed "journalist"— impart upon us all the wisdom your vast experience of a couple years of professional blogging and briefly working as a telephone answerer for Keith McNally has bestowed upon you. We await your brilliance and enlightenment with heaving bosom and bated breath!
• Uh oh. Are the producers of "The Real Houswives of New York" just a bunch of big backdoor bigots? Hmmm maybe?
= "personne extraordinaire"