F&F: Tartinery

May 3rd, 2010 by Dick Johnson

PX This presents THE F&F REVIEW

Hey, sorry we couldn’t make it to "Friends&Family," we were out of town/ had to work/ not invited. We’re really glad we finally managed to come by, though— it’s so nice to see you!
What’s that? You would still like us to take the time to fill out the F&F survey, because you’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you invited 75 people to F&F, and afterward all you got was 41 "Congrats[es]!" 22 "Awesome[s]!" 3 "Ciao[s]!" and 9 "Best of luck[s]!" ?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what friends & family are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !

 

Tartinery

What was your first impression?
This is cute.

Please rate the Bar:
More like a dining counter than a bar— and cramped, but OK. Comfortable enough. And clean, considering. Good for lunch or a quick late-afternoon/early-evening drink.

Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
Cocktails are N/A. The wine list is brief and a bit trite. Mostly French; not so eclectic. And expensive for the caliber level. If you’re with friends and insist on wine, go straight for the bottle, as the glass pour is frugal and hardly a value for your dollar.
Nice selection of freshly made juice concoctions, however. But where the menu says "mix your own," it’s a lie. They don’t actually have all the fruit ingredients they claim to have.

Please rate the Dining Room:
Not bad. Aesthetically pleasing if not entirely comfortable. Also somewhat cramped, but the high ceiling makes it seem loftier.

Please rate the BOH:
Satisfactory; maybe a C+ or B-. Simple offerings, decent quality— but again, expensive for the offerings.

How was the staff?
Fine. Not exactly amiable; very French. Adept, but neither particularly enthusiastic nor conscientious.

What did you eat?/ How was the food?
House Salad : Fine. Fresh. Adequate balsamic vinaigrette, and the walnuts are a nice touch. All tartines come with a complimentary house salad, so keep that in mind when you order.
Caesar Salad : Eh. The croutons are stale. And the dressing is a bit bland. Cheap parmesan. Also, it would have been nice had the waiter informed us (2 people) that the tartines include a house salad (or offered us an upcharge for Caesar instead of House) when we ordered. 2 people: 2 tartines (with 2 House Salads) and 1 Caesar Salad. Do we look like rabbits, or are you just a niggardly shyster? Hmm….
Foie Gras Tartine : Really? This scant a smear of foie gras for $18.50? I don’t even know if it’s good, because I can barely taste it. Good thing it comes with a dollop of fig jam, or it would have nearly no flavor at all.
Croque Madame : Good. Elementary, but tasty enough. Is all the money collected from patrons allotted to flying the bread in from Paris or something? Because this quantity of food/drink at this level of quality does not warrant these pretty hefty price tags. I’d get an in-house bread baker to follow the recipe instead.
(And, I’d rather you keep your “free” House Salad, and just give me a better tartine for my money.)

What did you like?
The concept.

What did you dislike?
The pretentiousness (especially for such a casual eatery).

What was your last impression?
$90 for 2 people (including 1 glass of wine, 2 juices and tip) and I’m still hungry. I could have had a good full dinner for this amount elsewhere.

Would you come back?
Maybe— but I’d really have to be craving a (very small, open-faced) sandwich badly to spend an average of $12 on one.

Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
Thanks and best of luck.

 

 

Tags: , ,

Leave a Reply

[in an effort to avoid "spam," comments with URLs are subject to pre-approval]

Filed Under: EAT THIS